Anyone been through mediation?

We start mediation tomorrow.

I had thought we would keep it simple but he is starting to be awkward when we talk.

I hope the mediator will explain how a charge on the property works, cos at the moment my husband is saying the charge will go on the value of the house now, and not when it is sold. I think it is otherwise.

Hi Nettle

When you say charge on the property do you mean the percentage you will each get? If this is the case I believe that the non resident person gets there percentage when the house is sold.

If I'm completely missing your point please tell me and will try to advise.

Autumn

Sorry, I will try to clarify.

I know I wont get the money until my son reaches 18, and either the house is sold or my husband raises the money for me by remortgaging or whatever. But will my percentage be of the current value of the house, or the value when it is sold?

x% remains the same, so x% of sale it is (not x% of value now), where x% is percentage that stake in house buys at time of setting up.
Such charges are pretty standard, so sols will know the right words to use to prevent abuse (e.g. sell cheaply to friend so you get less, don't keep in good condition, etc: ) but fair expenses are allowed (e.g. estate agents fees).
This gives general picture so ex can't bamboozle you. Let sols sort out any details.
Have a look elsewhere on the site. This is covered reasonably well.
Hope this helps.

Our first appointment was 17th Sept. Due to my ex's work schedule, and our mediator only working Mondays, our second appointment is a month later: 15th Oct.

At this rate, we'll probably still be here in six months time!

Any advice on what is usual in appointment times? (From others' experience).

Hi Sera

Am in similar situation to you, had 1st appointment on 19th September and next one not until 11th October. I was hoping it would be a weekly thing so it would all be over quickly! Our mediator thinks we will need 4 to 5 sessions.

Take care

Autumn

I can understand the first 'gap', (to value assets, pensions, incomes etc) but after that!? One 1.5 hr meeting every month is very slow. My x2b asked for the 'quickest route out of this'. (I suggested mediation).

Since he wasn't honest about his finances, unless I can encourage him to fully disclose, this will then run to FH at court! So, if that's the case, should I just put-my-foot-down at 2nd mediation meeting, quote the 'promise' to be honest pledge we have to sign, and stop the process.

I'm scared that a court would say I'd refused to mediate.

I don't wish to spend 4-6 months battling a lost cause!