lost

Well, this is a week to the minute since she walked out the door. Feels like a year ago... So much has happened, so many feelings, so many tears, so much pain.
I am such a different guy to who I was....

One week closer to feeling ''normal''...

When I feel low or my head is spinning with what seems unsurmountable pain or sadness, I do something which requires my full attention. It gives me a break from my own thoughts.

In the past it was long bike rides with my boys, the focus on watching them, making sure they were safe, looking for places to stop for a drink and a snack (which we carried with us). All very exciting for 2 young lads and definitely took me out of my headspace.

Find things to do with your children, plan, occupy yourselves, and you might just catch yourself out when realise you haven''t thought about her, for at first a short while, and then increasingly longer periods.

Look after yourself,

jaw

Just found out that she''d been lying, he has been in my home, he probably has been in my bed. Feel so sick. I am gutted...

Try not to think about what she has been doing, there will be many things that turn up now that she has been found out, I speak from experience. I felt a total fool to find out that my Stbx had been having an affair for at least 18 months behind mt back and with his step niece, I only found this out because I discovered an affair he was having with a work colleague. The more I thought about thinks the worse I felt.
Only now 18 months down the line have I realise i cannot change what he did however I can control how it makes me feel.
Yes it is devastating and slowly you will deal with that but do NOT let her destroy your life, she was the one who has deceived you, she was the one who cheated, the only thing you did was trust and love someone who has let you down.
You are still in the very early days, it may well get worse before it gets better but it is a journey you can make. Think of your boys and stay strong for them.

Thanks, I just cant believe it, it is like a story line from a soap... I cant believe this stuff goes on in real life, has no one any respect for other people... ffs

(((confused)))

As GSN has said,you will learn out loads of things now,and yes they will rip you apart,but they will enable you to find some strength to fight yourself back to some sort of normality for yourself and the kids....

We cannot do nothing about the past,it''s done with,the present we have to live through the best way we can,but the future we can all do something about....
As you said "your now a differant guy"well I think we can all relate to that,divorce does change you,personally I think it hardens you,maybe I''m wrong,but divorce is not the end of the world,there is still a life to be had....and believe it or not, a good one!!!!

Take care of yourself and the kids
Stay strong
Luv and cwtchs
Afon xx...............................

At times my life has been more complex than a plot from a soap.
If I had been an outsider and someone was telling me the things I have had to deal with I would have been skeptical that it was true.But I have lived every sordid minute of it.
yes people do this all the time it appears from what is said on here. Some people are just very selfish and think of themselves at all costs but luckily NOT everyone is the same.
Some people have no morals. I always think as long as I can hold my head high, as long as I know the truth about what I have done and how I have behaved, as long as I have loyal family and friends then what anyone else does is not my problem. It has taken me a long time to get to this point and even as recent as yesterday I was still allowing him to make me feel bad. But I have a new mantra - I am in charge of my own life, i am in charge of my own feelings, he can only hurt me if I let him and he has hurt me too much already- it has to stop for me now.
You need to grieve for your lost relationship, for your lost future but also you need to see that there is still a bright future for you even though at the minute it may not seem like it.