I've ruined my life

Well done for binning that letter, you've made the right choice.

When my wife left me, I quickly realised it was best to have no contact with her unless she contacted me. Also, when I was soft with her at first and trying to be understanding it didn't work at all, it just made her more aggressive towards me. When I started standing my corner and manning up a bit, she sure did change her attitude!

I know its very tough and I sympathise, but you have to go NC and become as hard as nails.

Hope this helps you,

Jam.

Thanks Jam,

It ALL helps mate, it really does. I know what I should do, I tell others often enough.

Saying and Doing are VERY different though

I'm with you Jam, cut the B*tch dead, I tried that nice guy routine, only back fired and she abused the situation further, old addage "give em an inch and they'll take a mile" she did. Totally over it and her now, only have contact where it involves the Kids and that when absolutely necessary. Cut out the good guy routine.

Hi,
Glad it went ok with your son, lucky lad. Let us just hope that it has made him sit up and think about it all.

Also glad that you did not give her the letter.

If you have long legs, you need to lift one up, and, place it as far behind you as possible, and then do the same with the other... ... time to take a big step back now.

good luck
zara

Too right Sad!

Lsot, I know your brain and emotions are telling you to cling on to her, believe me I know how difficult it is, but you have to take tougher steps to deal with the situation.

I was soft at first, in the hope for reconciliation, but most of the time it never comes, when a woman says she's done, she's done!

Doesn't matter whats past, you can't change it so forget it.

Be tough, be strong, take control of your life and you WILL come out the other side.

Good luck,

Jam.

Thanks again people.

SG and Jam, yep, I know, I know. Trust me, I really do.

Zara. Stepping as we speak.

Hi Lsot - You have had alot more to cope with over the last day or so, and been so strong. Actually writing that letter to your wife was a good thing to do, but getting rid of it before handing it over to her must have taken some doing.
Hope things ease off for you a bit now.
best wishes