Social services are ruining my life

I think the programme you need your boyfriend to do is called Respect. Ask your social worker if there is one in your area that he can attend, and don't live with him until he has completed it and the people who run it think he is safe.

I am inclined to agree with others who have said that you must keep your social worker informed about this. If you get back together with your boyfriend without telling them, and without him doing such a programme, they are likely to take your daughter away from you.

Best wishes,
Sadie

This website is very good and has the Respect phone number:

www.domesticviolence.co.uk/

If you are in London you could try these people:

www.everymanproject.co.uk/index.html

Best wishes,

Sadie

i agree to and we are going to inform them of what we are doing and also not live together till they think he has really made the change . we are in birmingham do they do them here

thank you for your help

see my edited post above for the domestic violence website which has the respect phone number on it. They can tell you if they have a programme in your area. I can't imagine that a city as big as Birmingham wouldn't have something.

Sadie

ok i will do

thank you for your help

taya

Good. But be warned, TayaMay, he doesn't just have to do the programme, it has to work. At best these programmes only have about a 50% success rate. The social workers will know this. So don't assume that just because he does it they will think that it's OK for you to live together. They will want to see some real and sustained change, and they will probably want to monitor his progress with the people running the programme.

best wishes,
Sadie