Feeling confused and lost again today

Hi
Just adding myself to this topic.
I too am on holiday for a few weeks now.
How I always loved this time in the summer , but this year!!
My children are grown up and here I am wondering what on earth there is to look forward to .And I too feel at times that surely this is not happening , it seems unreal . I do try and do something nice each day , even if its just reading a good book for a while , I have spent time reading stuff on this site to try and understand my legal position , but really I dont want to be doing this at all! I want to be enjoying a glass of wine an a chat like we used to on a Friday night. Lets hope for all our sakes that next year is a better summer !

Snap on the feeling lonely and low. Maybe it is something in the air!

My ex was chasing me last week to spend time with and then suddenly withdrew back into coldness.

Pity we all can't meet up and have a few glasses of wine! I bet that would cheer us up:)

Good luck to you all and to you Linda. It will pass as you know and you sill soon be strong again. Careful with that wine! I did that last night and have a hangover to prove it!


Andy

Hi Linda
Sorry to hear you are feeling confused and lost today. It must be something in the air. I too have been sitting alone in my garden wondering how it all came to this. Wondering what my stbx and his new woman are doing. It is so painful but tonight I did not shed any tears. It has been nearly 6 months now and although today has been a bad day there are now more good days than bad. When my friends on Wiki told me this at the beginning I never thought there would be any good days but believe me there are. I don't know if it will help you but I tell myself constantly that there is no goind back after all the lies and cheating and hurt that he has caused and that I must look forward. I too cope better with no contact with him whatsoever. He texts about seeing the boys and that is it. The other night he rung my son's mobile (he had left it at home) and i answered it not knowing it was him. It was the first time I have spoken to him in months and do you know what he called me 'babe' just like he always used to. It upset me so much and made me realise that no contact is the best way for me to deal with this. After spending 27 years of your life with someone it is hard to move on and look forward to the future but I take one day at a time. I am still not strong enough to go down the divorce route yet but I know that when I am my friends on Wiki will be there to support me every step of the way. Keep you chin up Linda, I know how hard it is but we all deserve so much better. Love K xx

Not feeling quite so lost now thanks to you all - knowing you are not the only one going through it - not that I wish this pain we are feeling on any of you - no one deserves this.

Anyway started on the wine and then unexpectedly a friend popped in 'just to see how you're doing' so we ditched the wine had a cup of coffee, a chocolate eclair and a two hour natter - feel so much better and won't have the hangover tomorrow! Just when I'm feeling very sorry for myself I am reminded what wonderful friends I have and I truly would not be getting through this without them and my fantastic family.

Andy - I feel for you at the moment - as I said yesterday my husband did the same thing - reeled me in again, started to unburden his guilt, started to flatter me again etc. etc. and then went cold again - it's cruel.

Karen - my husband does the same as yours - in between being cold and cruel at times throws in the odd 'babe' or 'darling' and you wonder what is going through their minds.

I, like you, feel this will end in divorce but am not strong enough to start the process yet and have put the ball in his court and told him that as he was the one to destroy my family he can be the one to do the dirty deed.

I do still have many better days than bad days now - it's still only been four months but am stronger but when I get these days they still hurt as much.

Heres hoping our weekends get better!

Linda

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