The anger has arrived.......

reading about your anger is great, although a very disturbing feeling especially when you can't vent it prperly. Those 5 stages of grief we all know about: dabda: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance is a pertinent spectrum to consider when your feeling insanely angry and frustrated. Don't know your story but i found this web site in the nick of time last week when i was trebly angry and it saved somebody's bacon!! Trebly angry: angry at the lying, cheating b*****d for putting us in this mess, doubly angry for getting angry at him cos he turns this to his own advantage and trebly angry for marrying him in the first place. Am relieved less angry this week as it is really unpleasant and gains nothing in the long run. My sitch remains the same but the emotion has changed to too tired to bother with anger.

Like stillalive I envy the anger, I have had moments of it but more in frustration than true anger.

I just feel so saddened by the whole sorry mess, the lies, teh total betrayal and deciet that has happened. And then getting blamed for it. Well I'm sorry but I neverforced him to have sex with other women!!! and it was just for the variety oh he had to pay for it!!!

Well sorry mate but you were never that great in bed no wonder you spent most of your savings on tarts cos any decnt woman wouldn't have you.

Except of course I did, so that spoils that little rant!!

Vent vent away that is about as close as I get to anger, it'sthe hurt and betrayal that's the worstto cope with I wish I could scream and shout and apart from nce have never shouted in the whole damned 9 months this has been going on.

I'm too emotionally drained and saddened for it andwish to god it ad never happened bu now I know I don't want him back, I just feel sorry for my children that they hve such a liar, cheat and generally unreliable person for a father.

Nuf said

Hey Jessie
How r Ya??

Oh the hours I've spent raging about my stbx and the plans for revenge-they're endless.

But I discovered something a couple of weeks ago which is turning the heat of my anger down. The more I show my anger to the idiot the more he appears to get off on it. My point here is that I've decided he's just not bloody worth it-I got better things to be doin now.

I laugh me head off cos the amount of anger and conflict that my stbx has with the ow is mounting all the time.

Thick as mince the pair of them!!
Take it easy girl
Luv Mirfield;)

Woke up this morning and .... yup its still there!!!

However, I am far too proud and principled a person to do anything that will make me look as bad as him!! I am using my anger to just simply ignore him ... calls, texts and personal appearances!

I have told our kids they can phone him or see him as much as they like ... or not at all... it is entirely their choice. They are old enough to decide and they deserve to have their own emotions.... not mine inflicted upon them.

I am just more angry that he shared his deceit (however minor) with MY family and when I vented my splean about it to those closest to me ... they already knew.I could easily have lost my family over this ... but that wont happen.

Me and Him had had sooooo many conversations about others deceiving their nearest and dearest and he was always as judgemental as me about it ....Hipocrite!!!

Oh well, anger vented and off to work ..... happy smily face, head up high (and very bad girl thoughts going through my head!!!)

Good for you. I know its a bitter pill but there are lots out there that do this. My ex lied and decieved for 12 years. She did that to her 1st husband and now she is doing that to her bf who she will marry. I dont understand why people do this? Its not just men that are liers its women too. But anger is one of the 7 phases and its good that you are at this phase. But. Dont stop thinking. Anger removes clear thought. It makes us do things that we wouldnt normaly do so watch yrself. Channel your anger into motivation. This way you do the right thing and ager can be used in a positive way. Anyway just also want to say, there are decent men and women in this world and also you are lucky that you found out. C

I sympathise with your feelings. It is part of the healing process. However, I would be very careful as to not do or say anything that might then leave you with a whole load of guilt to deal with. At present you can rest assured that you did nothing wrong. Guilt can be just a soul destroying as what you have and are going through. Don't give them the satisfaction of knowing how high your emotions are and letting them know this is affecting you so much. Go to the gym and take it out on some equipment. This way it will make you look and feel better to attract EVENTUALLY someone who actually deserves you.

Hi
Tells us whats made you so angry petty or not?
Some of what you have said I can relate to.