Mediation without proposal

Hi, my stbx has given me her financial proposal but before I can reply with a counter proposal she has booked mediation. What happens if I don''t go will this go against me? I can''t see we have anything to mediate over until she has seen my proposal.

What should I do?

It wont stand against you. But mediation usually helps.

There is no harm in going to mediation. A counter proposal isn''t necessary at this stage. The first meeting is to find out about the process and whether mediation is appropriate in your circumstances.

Then you go through the figures together with the mediator. Even if no agreement can be reached over a few sessions a mediator may facilitate better communication so you will have a better idea of what can be agreed, what might be agreed and which issues are outstanding. That could save you a fortune in exchanging solicitors'' letters.

I have booked a financial consultation and when that is done I will have a cleare picture of my proposal compared to hers. I want to wait until we have both this may even avoid mediation but she has to do everything at her speed. I don''t see the point in mediating over nothing. She said she has made the appointment without asking if I can get home from work at that time. What will the letter say when I receive it? Can I say that I am unavailable at that time in order for me to get this appointment with the solicitor?
Thanks

Very little happens at the first session, it''s just about how it works and what disclosure is needed, but I agree with you, find out what''s fair first, then if you can''t agree mediate, so why not just say I''d like to wait until I''ve talked with my lawyer, there is no reason for anyone to object.

Thank you I had visions of this being seen as me being awkward I do want mediation if we can''t agree but I don''t want to spend money until I know we need mediation. I will see what the letter says. I just hope she does not say to go straight to court.
Thank you

I just don''t see the wisdom in spending £200 per hour with a mediator who cannot tell you what is fair or often are not legally qualified in anyway until you have talked with someone who can tell you what is fair.

As any mediator what they do, they will say dispute resolution, I have a very good friend who is a mediator who won''t talk to any clients unless they have sought legal advice first.