CMA Issues

Jedzy:

I know its not my responsibility to make him see his children, I just feel for them when he lets them down and sometimes they see me as the bad guy... My oldest is only 7.

And I know he''s using the payments and seeing them as a bargaining tool to get what he wants, for us its a no win situation really... considering he either says he''ll pay the money and not see the kids or not pay the money and see the kids

Lostboy:

Thank you for replying.

The CMA system has worked really well during the time I have been using it.
Tried their family based arrangement but that never started so getting them to arrange payments has been good expect he''s not paying them.

I am more than meeting my responsibility as a mother towards my children.
I actually try not to let the kids see what a disappointment he is, but at what cost?

I can see me being stung from many angles and its not fair, why should he be allowed to manipulate us...

I went through the same thing - I tried to hide my stbx behaviour from my kids - they are older though so he contacts them directly. Sadly his attitude towards them has been such that none of them will reply to his messages or return his calls - none of my doing - I encourage them to have some sort of relationship with him.

I hope you get sorted - the cms can take the money directly from him and he will pay a lot more if they do this.

Thankyou for your help...
i''ll be back once i''ve spoken to the CMA