Maintenance

When I met my stbx Ihad a furnished 2 bed rented home, no debts and a small amout of savings. Stbx brought no furniture to the home and had debts of £1500. During our marriage he went to uni to gainqualifacations so that we could support our family, and once all the children were at school I would just get a wee job during schhol hours. Now he has a salary of £33k. and I can't even get employed as I am restricted to school times.

i have always been a stay at home mum, stbx was in total agreement with this even up to 2 weeks before he walked out. He left to live with another local family. In the first month that he left he emptied all the joint accounts and moved our mortgage direct debit. He has also removed up £1500 worth of tools and out door items from the property.

He pays £396 csa money and the mortgage of £297. I pay out of the childrens benifits all their expences and my own. He will not help towards anything that the children need i.e new beds, school trips, clothing. I am living hand to mouth while he is buying cars and boats and horses for the children in his new family. He had told me I am entittled to nothing and will not pay spousal maintenance. When the family house is sold, which I have to do as I can't afford to run it, and I need to relocate so that I can get qualifications to gain employment as I live in a very rural location (40 miles to the nearest town)he has stated he wants 50% of profit (he is now blocking the sale of the family home).

Is it right that I walk away from this marriage in a worse postion than when I entered it. I don't understand why he is entittled to everything when there are 4 children to be supported an provided for.

Hi cody
I understand completely! Im left with a mortgage to pay over 1000 a month sch fees utilities and he gives me csa 350! Cant sell home no equity I have increased my hrs but have had to borrow money to feed the kids he is aware of this and doesnt give one. His parting line was I will look after number 1.
Its astonishing what men get away with dont have any advice other than get an excellent sol and claim everything you can. Let all creditors know ur situation before you cant pay and they will be kinder. Heres hoping it works out for you.

Yes it is astonishing. I got a similar reason he had better things to do with his life. He has interest which he wants to follow. He didn't mention he had added anew toy!!! and her extras!!!

cody girl, what he wants isn't necessary what he will get. If you are the main carer of the chil dren the courts will recognise that. Seek advice from a solicitor and don't let him bully you into anything. Good luck cj

Cody you are entitled to half of everything. You must see a solicitor, if you can, get one who offers legal aid.
In the interim they can request alimony. You will also be entitled to benefits, child tax credit at full rate and housing benefit. Probably more than I could advise, only finding this out myself as my BOAH is doing exactly the same after 30 years of marriage. He didn't quite break me over the years so he's in for one helava fight:woohoo:

The thing is the husband is paying CM as a contribution towards all the living costs of raising children and the mortgage already and on an income of £33k it is unlikely to pay more in the way of aliment at the moment. I'm not sure how on that income he can afford to pay £690 to the first family and afford horses and boats for the second.

If the house is sold some aliment before divorce or periodic payments after to allow for readjustment over a year or so might be in order. However, in Scotland Clean Break settlements and financial independence are the objective. There is an expectation that families will readjust to a lower standard of living.

The value of all the assets (including pensions) in his/her/joint names minus any liabilities on the date of separation form the net value of the property to be shared. In Scotland assets are shared 'fairly,' usually equally, but there are arguments based on being disadvantaged through having given up work for the benefit of the family and sharing the costs of raising children under 16 which justify claims for a larger share.

It is a question of picking battles very carefully. Emotion just hurts the wallet and high levels of conflict are damaging to long term family relations at the detriment to the emotional well being of any children.