Questionaire

Just before our first appointment my sxtb and I exchanged questionaires. He had 3 questions for me, all quite general and I gave full explanations for each question. I had 6 questions for him, all very relevant to our case. My solicitor told the Judge our form could be submitted within a few days. His solicitor however, had a bone to pick with every damn question I asked. The Judge upheld them all and said they MUST be answered.
So, a week later, I see my stbx's answers, and they were diabolical. I think his solicitor told him what to say.
Without going in to the specific questions, on one most important question he said 'it is not relevant so no need to answer', and on another regarding payments made towards mortgage, which he knows fine well how many he has made, he simply said he 'does not recall'. On another about an upcoming major holiday next year he has been telling our children about, he said, 'I have no such holiday planned'. Yet 2 days later the kids came home and said they wished they were going to America with their dad next year and he had been showing them the routes he was going to drive! How can he (and his solicitor) get away with this ?? It is blatent lies! The Judge specifically said they should be answered.

fedup,

Your STBX appear to have missed something here. |As you say, it is a JUDGE who has agreed these questions should be asked ... so this response:

one most important question he said 'it is not relevant so no need to answer',

Is likely to make him look pretty silly.

Do you already know the answers to any of these questions? ie do you have evidence of how many payments he has made to the mortgage?

The holiday is trickier. If he has booked it, that will show up on credit card/bank statements. If he has not, it is harder to prove.

However, if you maintain your honesty and integrity and he is evasive and unhelpful, I am sure the judge will be able to make up his own mind about who is to be believed.

His solicitor sounds like one of the awkwad b's who knows they don't have a leg to stand on and, instead of providing a proper case, is resorting to attacking you. Very nasty to deal with but do try to remain dignified. I am afraid I know this breed only too well as my STBX has one .. but the judge at FH did not agree with any of their contentions about me .. in fact he complimented me in his summing up .. and told them they were being unreasonable.

Hadenoughnow

I know the answers to 3 of them, and have very good evidence of another. I think you are correct in saying they know he does not have a leg to stand on, and yes, they are making my life very hard and uncomfortable. I don't deserve this do I ? Why should a professional man be bullying me ? It makes me fell very vunerable..

Hi there

Amazing isn't it, how all of a sudden this person, the person you have known for years turns into a lying, feeble child hiding behind their solicitor!!

You keep true and strong. It is hard to hide the truth without slipping up.

good luck

zara

PS how about inventing a truth pill that has to be taken before filling in a form.

An update. I answered all 3 questions asked by my stbx solicitor. I sent original copies of all documents asked for, I have just kept the photocopy for my own reference. Low and behold, this morning, I receive a letter from my solicitor stating that out of the 3 questions asked my stbx solicitor is dissatisfied with 2 of my answers. I have answered the questions fully, giving supporting documentation and evidence as requested. I am certain of this. My solicitor is asking me to contact her on Monday to discuss.
It has already been identified that his solicitor is quite a nasty man, but why should he be making me feel the way I am feeling? I feel bullied and intimidated and now going to spend the rest of the weekend with my head in turmoil, wondering what he is going to come up with next.
Maybe he just killing time; the FDR is at end of October. The thing is, my stbx answers to my questionaire were not worth the paper they were written on. As I said before, I know for absolute certain he has been very untruthful. And I can prove this. So why am I the one that keeps being bullied.
I wish I could stand in front of a judge and tell them the way this supposedly professional man has intimidated and bullied me for the last 9 months. Damn solicitors!

Hi,
Of course his solicitors are not pleased with the answers and documentation to the 3 questions, THEY KNOW THAT THEY ANSWERS ARE CORRECT. They obviously will contest them, if I were you, I would be quite pleased, you hit a raw nerve.

The judge has already said that he has to answer them.
Stick you ground, dont feel bullied, turn it around, you ruffled their feathers!! They did not like it.

Keep to the truth, this with evidence says it all. just make sure your solicitor does not make you retract any of the truth.

I would say to you well done, have a good weekend, knowing that when people bully, they are usually in the wrong.

zara

Zara2008
You make so much sense. I know you are right. It just seems to be one thing after another with them both. They have their FDR date, why can't they just leave me alone