Solicitor or not!

Hi, Need a bit of advice please.

In a nutshell, separated 2 two years ago. we were not married. Finacial agreement sorted and i agreed to a lower child maintance amount as per the ex''s request. i agreed to have kids every other weekend and the odd nights during the week. Nothing was cast in stone other than the CM amount.
Due to changes in my personal ife (new girlfriend) and lots of business travel. I have not lived up to what i said in our agreement. Now i have been sent a solicitor letter which really doesn''t say anything other than a warning. I have put new options to her but she will not listen to me and is saying everything must go through a solicitor. I have told her i will not be wasting my time effort and money on solicitors when we can agree new arrangements over e-mail. I have never said i will not pay the full CM amount. The amount i pay is what she wanted (she''s loaded). Question is. What happens if i ignore her solicitor letter(s)?. Guess she could go to the CSA, but if she wants the money I''ll change the bloody direct debit today.
Don''t get me wrong i love my kids and i do see them regulary but if i''m away for business i can''t...

Advice welcome

What is the issue? Is it in relation to contact arrangements or child maintenance? The maintenance issues can be dealt with by the CSA in the absence of agreement (either of you can apply) but the contact issue should be agreed if at all possible.

Try to avoid instructing a solicitor if you can as it adds an additional level of stress and conflict. If you need to know what your options are then get advice from a solicitor but you don''t need to hand over the reins - just see where you stand.

Charles

Charles,

Thanks for the reply. I beleive her issue is with the contact. Our daughter has complex disabilities and needs a lot of looking after, its not 24/7 but can be stressful.Our son is fine. Think its the fact that she can''t lead her life the way she wants too as i am not around as much as i said. I don''t beleive it''s about the money more i''m not doing exactly what i said, for which there are reasons as i have explained. Without doing doing my job i can''t support my kids, which is what any decent man would do. Right.
perhaps she shouldn''t of eneded the 16 year relationship. I have no doubt she is bitter that i now have a life and she doesn''t/cant have the one she thought she could. the grass isn''t always greener!.
I actually put a note through her door on 12/10/12 giving her a new way forward. She ignored it. Now i ask about it and she tells me it''s with her solicitor. A waste of time effeort and money. A five minute chat would sort everything. She''s off her rocker!!

Just because she instructed a solicitor doesn''t mean you have to. You can communicate with her solicitor if she doesn''t want to speak to you. Yes, it would be easier to talk in person and I would always advise avoiding this if possible! But if she is having a hard time coping then this might just be a knee jerk reaction.