I am after a bit of advice. I am married with a daughter (14 months) and over the recent few months, I am feeling as if my marriage is breaking down.
Before marriage, I was living in a flat. After meeting my husband, we decided to buy a house. It was solely in his name due to me not having money available to contribute towards deposit, but this has been our
marital home and I rented out my flat and have used that money to put in our joint account. I also paid for 100% of the wedding and honeymoon/ holidays etc. Early in the marriage I suffered a miscarriage in which I think I have been very emotionally affected by, perhaps even suicidal, and grew a bit distant with my in laws as I felt they did not help me through this time. We then went on to have our daughter by IVF and for a while things were going well. We decided to get some major renovations to our house which required us to move out.
During that time we went to live with my in laws and since then there has been turbulence. In my mind I was mistreated by them and when I tried talking to my husband, he seemed to always side against me. When we eventually moved back into our house after the work was carried out, we talked about wills. I was very scared that he would take what I own to give to his parents and let it slip that my former flat I would like to leave a part to my brother (who helped me with the deposit) and my daughter, by passing him. My husband then informed me that he wished to leave the house to his siblings (50%) and the other half to our daughter (50%) after our daughter turns 25. I have argued that it isn’t fair as I call this my home, I have contributed and I should be able to live here until death. Then his half can go to his family and my half can go to our daughter. He says that as he owns the house he has the right to do what he wants and that he paid the deposit with his money. And that he will only add my name to our house if I add his name to my flat (my flat has an £83 K mortgage and is woth £400K, our house has a £200K mortgage and is worth £500K).
I find that this is unfair as I have always contributed to the house runnings, given all my savings for the renovation work. He has not contributed in any way to my flat. I deal with tenants, repairs, cleaning. I take my daughter to nursery every day, collect her, cook, clean etc as my husband works far and long hours, and he is the bread winner. He can get aggressive with me at times and in return I get snappy (he has pointed a knife at me before) and this has leaded us to contemplate divorce. So my question is really, do I have any security to stay and live in my home despite what he puts in a will, assuming we are able to work things out. Or should I really go down the divorce line? I would obviously like to stay with my husband, especially for our daughters sake but I have given all that I have to him. All I have is my flat prior to marriage. Should we just add each other’s names to our properties?
