is there a chance?

kellymarie wrote:

I thought it would be harder for him to come back if everyone knew. I know that sounds so lame, maybe I am desperate!!

It’s quite telling that there are things that you would be embarrassed to share with family and friends. If the shoe was on the other foot, and one of your friends was experiencing your story; would you tell her to put-up-and-shut-up? You don’t have a magic wand to repair things; (if I did I’d have wished for the charming man I married and shared great friendship with) and not had to put up with the manipulative, angry, controlling, aggressive bastard that he became.

It’s best you get some professional help if you want to move forward; but he’s got to be doing some work on himself also, it's unlikely you'll fall back into how it was before. It'll maybe calm down untilt he next time.

Reading between the lines: it sounds like he’s having an affair and can’t make his mind up. He’s allowing contact (e-mails, texts) but non verbal...why is that? Maybe he doesn’t want someone else overhearing your conversations?
He is using controlling tactics (calling, hanging up) and you seem to be taking blame when he does call.

It takes two to work at a marriage; not just for him to ask what YOU’RE going to do to make it work.

You're not lame and desperate. You're still in love, and you're not wrong in wanting that happiness back; it's just finding a realistic way of getting it back on track. If you succeed - good luck! And if you don't. We're here. (Not that we're grim-reapers! Just people that weren't given the choice to repair).

Sera
x

Hi Kellymarie

This might seem harse but he needs to be told that life is about give & take and that means he's got to give a little as well. If your too soft with him he might take the p*ss.

It sounds like he needs to grow up a bit and stop running away when he hears something he doesn't like.

Diplomacy needed I think, but don't be bullied either.

I hope things get better for you soon.