partner won't apply for decree absolute

hi - is anyone in the same boat as me? I live with my partner who obtained his Decree Nisi about 8 months ago. He and his (nearly) ex wife separated all of 10 years ago. There are 2 children 14 and 12 who stay with us every other weekend. I moved in with him over a year ago and he promised he would get the divorce out of the way in 2007(not!) - but both he and wifey are stalling over financial arrangements even though they said they would go to mediation to sort it out. I know I am vulnerable as a co-habitee (i.e. I anticipate form E demands to know how much I earn to increase my partner's disposable income)and I know I have no "rights" to live in his house. I am beginning to think I've been taken for a bit of a fool with marriage promises and a diamond ring!! (which of course will need to be 6 months after the absolute)

I thought there was some sort of penalty if matters weren't sorted out within 12 months between nisi and absolute? Am I right in thinking this situation can go on indefinitely.

janjak

Calm down. Its usual to have delay in dec abso whilst financial matters are sorted. If the pettioner applies for absolute before these matters are sorted then they lose certain rights. Yes there are questions asked if an absolute is not sought after a period of time but it is common that this can take a while. You may be included in proceedings but thats to be expected. Its very hard to prove that people are co habiting though so dont worry to much. I dont think anyone bothers with the 6 month rule. If that was the case then they wouldnt say you are free to marry when you get the absolute. Just chill out let him do his divorce in peace. F

Thanks for your speedy response. Oh dear, do I sound a bit desperate? Its just that his wife + kids seem to completely dominate our relationship and she is expecting him to finance her (SM) for the rest of her life. I know his children have taken things from the house when they visit - credit card statements, for example, so she will have evidence that we are co-habiting. I know that despite his promises to me, he won't jump until it suits him, so maybe I should consider whether he's worth waiting for. I have grown up children and no ties now.......

LOL ok jan. Ex wives have a habit of wanting finances. They sometimes expect some compo for all the effort they have put in over the years. And your last bit is exactly the reason why I dont get involved with marrieds. There is too much baggage. F