feelig low and cant pick myself up ....

i thought i was doing great,

new friends ... new gf .... feeling good .... loosing weight ....

a lot of my old friends (hr friends as well) - are now 'turning' on me - stbx painting me as the bad person - always going out, cutting up her cards, wanting to have split custody (this is bad apperently!!!) - the children are the only thing she controls now and she is using it to good effect!!! she says that they cannot have school dinners bcs i wont give her the money - she forgets that it costs over £2500 to run the household on a monthly basis!

and new gf is being cold and distant - and it may just be me and my thoughts .... im scard to loose and also scared to gain - dont want to feel like this anymore...

its not even bcs i want to be with my stbx - its all about me - and the person who i am

just so low cant pick myself up

I stoped councilling bcs he made me realise that my stbx was an emotionally controlling person - and i told stbx - she called him stupid councilor - jont friends also said to stop going bcs it was changing me

no one likes the new me - not sure who i am anymore - not sure if i like the new me..

self esteem - thought i was building that but now not sure - just nothing there

Peter

We all have wobbles , you have not long been in this situation , yet now you have a new problem a new g/f whom you say is being cold and distant, maybe she is being that way as she is protecting herself whilst your going through this divorce, as i will always say divorce is crap never get involved with another person until things are sorted otherwise another person is being dragged into the mess.

Your self esteem is a rollercoaster up and down it goes people with high self esteem pick themselves up alot quicker than those with low self esteem , there are courses being run to help with self esteem maybe that would be better for you than counselling , best part of that course is the relaxation exercise.

I do remember you a few months back you were in a mess, then you seemed to be doing ok from what i remeber talking about with you , you fear being alone nothing wrong with being alone get yourself sorted then you will be free to give yourself 100% to another person.

hi angel,

thanks for the response - im not sure what my new gf is - whether she is or not!!! - getting confusing signals - from her - and i suppose from me as well!!

just wish i could feel normal - but then again i dont know what normal is!

Sorry to here you are feeling low there seams to be a lot of it about at the moment. Don’t worry about how like or approves of the new you.Ther is only one person who has to like the new you and THAT IS YOU!

I know it’s hard when someone has made you feel low about your self and before you know it you don’t know how you got so down about who you are. I have great respect for you loosing weight getting a new girlfriend it seams you are trying hard to move on. Don’t be too hard on yourself that things aren’t perfect. (No ones life is)

It’s always going to be two steps forward and one step back.

Hang on in there.

Jude
I am having a step back at the moment too.

im just re-writing my rules on how i behave at the moment ... its strange - bcs i have to find out all this behaviour stuff myself - all i have is my core values of being a decent person and treating people with respect - as i would too like to be treated - and the rest of the stuff has to be made up on the fly!!!

still i enjoy chatting now - enjoy txting - trying to ..