Husband is lost and upset.... advice needed

NikkiD wrote:
But, it's the most painful thing to go through. It's like being bereaved without a death, losing a child at the hands of another person who wants to control you. We have never known anything like it. It consumes every waking moment, it destroys sleep and breaks the heart into so many pieces you wonder if you will ever heal.

[/quote]

Yet society, professional, those without experience, etc thrust the added burden of expecting super human powers upon these parents!

Elle x

NikkiD wrote:

But, it's the most painful thing to go through. It's like being bereaved without a death, losing a child at the hands of another person who wants to control you. We have never known anything like it. It consumes every waking moment, it destroys sleep and breaks the heart into so many pieces you wonder if you will ever heal.

That's it in a nutshell,
Exactly how it affected me.

tom333 wrote:

NikkiD wrote:

But, it's the most painful thing to go through. It's like being bereaved without a death, losing a child at the hands of another person who wants to control you. We have never known anything like it. It consumes every waking moment, it destroys sleep and breaks the heart into so many pieces you wonder if you will ever heal.

That's it in a nutshell,
Exactly how it affected me.

Yep. Same here too. Still does....

NikkiD wrote:

Elle wrote:

NikkiD wrote:
But, it's the most painful thing to go through. It's like being bereaved without a death, losing a child at the hands of another person who wants to control you. We have never known anything like it. It consumes every waking moment, it destroys sleep and breaks the heart into so many pieces you wonder if you will ever heal.

Yet society, professional, those without experience, etc thrust the added burden of expecting super human powers upon these parents!

Elle x

Exactly Elle, super human powers upon those who are being squashed and deprived of compassion and respect, expecting them to carry on with their daily lives as normal, when their very essence has been ripped out of them, thrown to the floor and stamped on.

And, because it is emotional cruelty, there is no recompense.[/quote]


Recompense in any form is serious wishful thinking in that the problem is not supported...for those parents that try to find a way to exist without contact when all failed...recompense...hmmmm

Elle x

To me Nikki, recompense is when the child is free to make up its own mind and exercises the right they were denied by a controlling parent...I take hope from those that do...and pain from those that were too late! In the end....the children suffered unnecessarily, one parent was put through hell unnecessarily....uless of course it is necessary to accommodate the sick insecure mind of a selfish control freak.

Elle x

Elle wrote:

NikkiD wrote:

Elle wrote:

NikkiD wrote:
But, it's the most painful thing to go through. It's like being bereaved without a death, losing a child at the hands of another person who wants to control you. We have never known anything like it. It consumes every waking moment, it destroys sleep and breaks the heart into so many pieces you wonder if you will ever heal.

Yet society, professional, those without experience, etc thrust the added burden of expecting super human powers upon these parents!

Elle x

Exactly Elle, super human powers upon those who are being squashed and deprived of compassion and respect, expecting them to carry on with their daily lives as normal, when their very essence has been ripped out of them, thrown to the floor and stamped on.

And, because it is emotional cruelty, there is no recompense.

Recompense in any form is serious wishful thinking in that the problem is not supported...for those parents that try to find a way to exist without contact when all failed...recompense...hmmmm

Elle x




[/quote]

Yes, I think there is recompense,
If my daughter grows up to be a well adjusted and happy person in the face of all that has happened then that will be plenty recompense for me.

Now if her mother happened to walk out in front of a bus sometime.....................

NikkiD wrote:

Since contact has been awarded, that little girl has been so much closer to her dad. She frequently goes up to him and says 'ahhh my lovely daddy, I love you SOOOOOO much' and she just cuddles him and holds him, with an air of sympathy for him. She knows how much he suffered, because she suffered too.[/quote]

Nikki,

There can be no better rrecompense than that!

Elle x