Contact Hearings

Hi sorry if this is long winded.

I have two children aged 11 and 6.
I applied to stop contact following poor treatment of children during contact visits with my ex in August 2008.
A CAFCASS report was ordered whereby concerns were raised by CAFCASS with regards to exs conduct and at the next hearing an independant report was ordered for 4x4 hour assessed Supervised contact visits which took place in February.

Outcome of these visits was that there should be no further unsupervised contact and ex should go through some guidance on how to put childrens needs before his own amongst other things and then sessions of supervised contact to build up the trust of the children.

Ex refuses to accept this and did not attend next court hearing in April due to fact his Legal Aid had been withdrawn and problems with Statutory charge from Finance Hearing matters.

A further hearing was set in May at which ex turned up without representation as his Legal Aid still not reinstated and informed the judge he would not consider any sort of supervised contact. Judge advised him to go away and think about it and talk further to CAFCASS and adjourned the meeting again to enable him to seek legal advise and talk to CAFCASS.

Further hearing set for July, which following a letter from exs solicitors to say that his Legal Funding had still not been resolved was once again adjourned.

We now have a date for mid-August. What happens if his funding still not sorted and they request adjournment again. Can they just keep adjourning - how fair is this on the children as they need some conclusion to the matter whether that is contact or no contact they cannot continue to live in limbo and nor can I. I am struggling to pay legal fees as am not legally aided, I receive no maintenance and I am concerned as to what may happen if I represent myself in the future particularly if it comes to a contested hearing. My solicitor has various statements including CAFCASS and social work report and including one from my Step son (exs-son) stating that he received similar treatment from his father and has been afraid of him all of his life resulting in a breakdown when he was 18 (he is now 24).

To top it all my eldest son when speaking to CAFCASS and independant social worker originally said he would only see father if supervised as he was afraid of him. However, he has had no contact (telephone/letter or otherwise) with his father since the 4 supervised visits and he is now refusing to even consider supervised visits as he has passed his father several times in the street and has seen him about and his father refuses to acknowledge him. Where does this leave us if ex turns up and agrees to supervised contact? Will he be made to go? What about the 6 year old?

Any advise as to what may happen at the next hearing whether he turns up and agrees or whether he does not would be gratefully received

What a long drawn out nightmare for you and your kids. I'm not sure if it is the same in England/Wales but would think it would be similar - the eldest child's view would usually be taken into consideration, and this would become even more important when they turn 12 (not sure if it's the same age south of the border). Your eldest would then be able to have legal representation in their own right, which may help with sols bills. What is clear is that at the moment he is not going to get unsupervised contact and in my experience if he doesn't agree to this in the first instance then he is unlikely to get any - perhaps you should assume this to be the case and explain it in such a way to the children - it's surprising how much they understand.
Because of the length of time that the children haven't seen their father you should think about asking the court for a more gradual re-introduction (this is often looked on favourably)and also make sure that your eldest son's views are taken into consideration

On the money front have you thought of going to the CSA to get maintenance?

Janey

Janey

Thanks for that I will look into the issue of legal representation when eldest turns 12.

In respect of CSA have tried that but ex says he has no income despite splashing out on new work vans etc., and working regularly cash in hand - CSA answer is that he is entitled to be believed that he has no income and they have no powers to follow up any further even though he advertises in the local press which I have sent copies of to both CSA and inland revenue. Not sure what else I can do in that respect.